#ABetterYouIsABetterMe

  LIFE is a complex melody—that can change  its rhythm just when you think you’ve mastered the dance. Life can swing its pendulum from sanctuary to sorrow right when you are making plans for tomorrow—taking you from plans cemented to life disoriented in a matter of seconds.  LIFE  has a way of teaching over and over again—it is a gift to you—and to see it—live it—handle it —and LOVE it accordingly.  I feel LIFE very, very differently in this moment from anything I have ever experienced or felt before. And I am questioning —how that’s even possible considering all the others before? And I don’t know what this means… but I do know that in the last 24–48 hours I went from sanctuary to sorrow —plans cemented are now disoriented. My vision is blurred literally and figuratively—my heart is shattered which feels literal even if it’s not—something in my stomach feels like it’s a knot.  LIFE is but a dream—that’s what they say—and maybe that’s what this is. So, ...

Just as I was grabbing napkins to cover and dry my face of the downpour of tears that gushed out of nowhere this morning—while sitting at the restaurant table waiting on my meal—I received a text from a colleague—“I can feel your heart in this moment, and know that I am lifting you and your family up in prayer.” I thanked her and let her know that I needed and appreciated her prayers. The simultaneous text reminded me of the nearness of God that has always shown up for me.  And the depth of my “brokenheartedness”, in this moment is something with its own original intensity.  And I think I understand why that is. And perhaps understanding that will aid in my healing journey.        The morning before leaving Costa Rica —I sat at the breakfast table with a friend. And I tried to avoid telling her of the strange “feeling” of my baby brother Michael’s presence around me… I questioned why is this—literally what’s happening right now? Thinking, “Perhaps it’s beca...

  There’s this thin line of expression that we navigate right? …. especially with social media. I am admittedly the first to clutch pearls and teeth at over expressing (TMI)🙄 😬. Yet in a seemingly hypocritical swaying kind of way …. I do it too. Surely, as a writer—chronicler, podcaster, and blogger—I tend do so under those guises.        That said, someone shared with me that she recently muffled her expression of mourning over the loss of her mother because someone said to her, “You are not the only one to lose your mother and at some point you have to move on.” Which     is by far the most insulting and insensitive thing I’ve heard. But that’s not the emphasis here.          And of course there are researchers—largely psychology researchers that watch, assess, review and evaluate all of this stuff on social media platforms —around emotional content, virality, semantic space theory, and what helps predict social media post ...

S omeone will ask me this at least 2-3xs a year… So, thought I’d share a couple of the books that carried me through 2024–a couple will stay in rotation. Seemingly having no correlation with the other—but amazingly weaved together —and resided over—nurtured —and enveloped my heart, mind, soul—spirit—and body—this year like a  combination of 1000 thread count sheet—pillows—and comforter—like “The Comforter.” And for those of you that know that feeling—you know. But because I know how intricately woven I am by God—and how Intimately involved He is in the most minuscule matters of my life—He orchestrated the theme of my reading and writing—to culminate my years’ end—and arrival into this season of my life. I ’ ve grown   a lot over the years—but this past year I evolved with an awakening—awareness—and assignment that ONLY God could have orchestrated for me.  So…. ~ Dr. Anita Phillips’ - “A Garden Within” is a gift offering. Awakened my deepest heart-matters—and the revelatio...

  W hile navigating the many vicissitudes of womanhood… I often think of my mom and her sisters… and their mom (granny). My mother was born in February 1922–and in January 1922–“The Dyer Anti-Lynching Bill, the first of its kind, passes the U.S. House of Representatives in part due to the efforts of the NAACP.” She birthed me in 1964 when Dr. King was leading the cause for Civil Rights. Just a bit of trivia… In December’64 the month/year of my birth—“he made a stop in London for three days to preach at St. Paul's Cathedral and meet with leaders of the peace community.”       B ut prior to—and therein my mother—her mother—her sisters were Black women in an era when mostly all the freedoms, access and privileges that we enjoy(ed) today was denied them. But they somehow could see a brighter future—from where they began—and forge ahead with that hope. Religion, and hope going hand-in-hand in most instances—similarly today—and some pretty courageous leaders at the helm of...

💜💜           Image: BBC NEWS  T his past week at the health system and one of the entity hospitals that I work for—Alasia Janell Milburn, 25, died suffering from a gunshot inflicted by her boyfriend—marking the 2nd one this month. 💜      And while I don’t think it made a big splash on local news media cycles, although most of us tuned in obsessively to the 2024 Olympics, that Rebecca Cheptege—an Olympic long-distance runner was murdered in an act of domestic violence by her boyfriend. 💜      And I can only assume most of us saw the news about Amber Kelly of Sandy Springs, Georgia—killed by her boyfriend in May 2024. 💜      But so much is going on in our personal and global worlds right now that these happenings are merely antidotes of “news” and not anything we get to devote any attention to—even if we care to. But to me—it’s personal. 💜      That said, I am particularly grateful that October...

               B e cause emotions are so fickle—I suggest you journal instead of post. (Write, Resolve, Evolve); B e  cause YOUR time and your clock’s time are not one and the same—I suggest making good use of every breath you take. (Prayer, Meditation, Purpose); B e  cause someone you love is here today and might not be here tomorrow—I suggest you make today matter. (Memories, Love, Legacy); B e  cause attention seeking is not the same as being sought after—I suggest spending quality time with yourself because that’s attention well spent. (Introspection, Self-esteem, Growth); B e  cause life can be challenging—I suggest you know who you are and who you want to be. (Core Values, Resilience, Strength); B e  cause friends & family are humans too—I suggest you love without conditions instead of holding on to expectations. (Forgiveness, Acceptance, Compassion); B e  cause nothing you have is going to sustain yo...

     BEFORE you read (if you read) any further, I want to draw your attention to the pictures… these very different pictures are the same exact tree….      One of the heaviest burdens  and stresses we carry is trying to keep up appearances for the acceptance and approval of other people—that’s oftentimes detrimental to emotional wellbeing.      “Enjoy the highs, Learn from the lows, remain Steady during the plateaus…I was reminded of this quote by Sam Chan from a recent sermon. And though, I have a pipeline of posts that I planned to share throughout the month of May, in honor of #MentalHealthAwarenessMonth—today, I thought to share a current moment.         I took a walk this morning … in the rain. And only those that are in my inner most circle likely know that I had an aversion to rain for many years, and dreaded having to go out into it… so much so that as a high schooler, my dad noticed my hesitation to leave for...

     M ay’s days have s been designated to Mental Health Awareness. With the exception of my church and a couple other forums, I haven’t heard much of anything, but the month is early yet. But what about you—are you having discussions about mental health in your networks—what about in your friend and family circles?  May is also the month we celebrate Mother’s Day. What a combination… 🌸💖  On that note, I am confident that because my mom has been gone for so long, it doesn’t occur to folks, in my circle, that I still mourn her when mom’s are being celebrated—even when I am being celebrated. In fact, we buried my mom’s last sister on Friday— “Aunt Annie”🌸💜🌹—and as I viewed her body, I experienced the exact same emotions as I did when I said my goodbyes previously to my mom’s other sisters (my aunts)—a feeling of unearthing a goodbye to my very own mom. So, that said, a few people have recently lost their moms within the last 1, 2, 3, 4… years or so, and when ...

D ear December, T hank you! The month of my birth — the month that God pre-ordained that I’d enter the earth.  Thank you Dear December   for allowing me to occupy space and time on your calendar — made all the more an honor because it’s the month I celebrate the birth of my Savior Jesus Christ.             It’s safe to say you are my favorite month of the year. A month that from childhood through now has provided me with some of the happier, more pleasant, joy and family-filled times of my life.              Dear December, I am eternally grateful to see you come around again because that means I’ve been blessed to get another year older — a privilege that I don’t take for granted or assume that I will get again. So, I look to you for the inspiration that you tend to bring. You are the month that seemingly brings with it an anticipation, hope and joy that revives, ...